Saturday, July 4, 2009

Kind Of Here

Thanks, Sky, for encouraging me to post again. Lots of things have happened, but best of all is that we had the twins about a month ago. They were born at 34 weeks 3 days and spent 3 weeks in the NICU. Despite having placenta previa, pre-term labor and pre-eclampsia, we all thought I was going to go all the way. And then dd's water broke and they were born. (Hence, why I didn't have steroids to mature their lungs and why they were in NICU so long) That said, I was in the hospital off and on for 6 weeks.

One thing I've learned: DE significantly increases one's chances for pre-eclampsia, as does twins and advanced maternal age. Placenta previa increases with IVF, twins, and advanced maternal age. And preterm labor is increased by twins.

What's so amazing is NONE of those lead to the early birth---it was the premature rupture of membranes! What a bizarre thing!! For those of you out there thinking of DE and who are, ahem, older, keep that in mind. And I'm pretty healthy!!

The twins are wonderful and I finally feel like the family is complete. Those souls who have been trying to reach us finally have. I'm sleep deprived but so, so happy.

We have not told my parents about using DE and they are constantly looking for family resemblenaces in the babies, which is sad for them. However, the twins look very much like our first son and DH, so we're emphasizing that.

I am VERY annoyed at my OB for putting our DE status on my OB records: it ended up on the kids' NICU medical records which I am pretty sure was observed by some friends and colleagues whom we think is none of their business about our twins' origins. I specifically asked our OB NOT to do that. We are planning to disclose, but we live in a part of the country which is a little backward on non-traditional family formation, and don't want to be the object of gossip in the community. (ie, this ain't California where it's no big whoop-de-do how one forms one's family).

In any case, our twins are beautiful, healthy and completely normal. We are bonding now and getting to know each other. I do think about the donor sometimes and wonder what her kids look like as well as her other donations, but these are *MY* beautiful, wonderful, amazing children. I am so proud of what they have done already in their first month of life. They are wonderful.

Yes, I'll continue posting here and reading other DE blogs. But I still get annoyed at folks who have chosen DE and appear to regret it. I am thrilled that we have found this path and that the children who have been trying to reach me for the last 4 years have finally arrived.

Well, the babies are likely to be wanting their late morning snack soon. I need to have a snack myself before I become their cow. I love being where we are right now, even though I haven't slept more than 2 hours in a row for a month, and don't anticipate doing so for another 4 or 5 months, too.

6 comments:

Sky said...

DE Mommy, you can see I've been stalking your blog. Wow! I'm so very happy for you - thrilled in fact!

I did know about the increased risk of pre-eclampsia in DE - particularly in twins and advanced maternal age. EEK! I'm 2 out of 3 (providing my BFP turns into a healthy beta and baby). I'm actually a bit terrified over the pre-eclampsia risk, but trying not to let it ruin any sanity I have left.

I'm also really thrilled to read that the DE decision was only solidified for you in seeing them. I've never really had the issues some women have over DE, though I do understand why it's a loss, so I don't imagine having a lot of trouble later on.

Big hugs to you and the twins - may you all bask in this wonderful time of your lives!

Summer said...

Congratulations! Thanks for posting and sharing the great news with us.

Brenda said...

Great! I was hoping things were going well for you all :) I am sorry that the twins made an earlier-than-expected appearance, but so happy that they appear to be home and doing well!

Bee Cee said...

Congratulations!!

Midlife mommy said...

Wonderful news! I'm so glad you and the babies are doing well. Enjoy.

John and Angel said...

You've been nominated for the "One Lovely Blog" Award, details in our blog.