Update 1

I went in this morning for the second look at my lining. It was a 7, which I'm pretty sure was the same thing it was last week. I'm not supposed to have my "passing" ultrasound until next week....in California...at the clinic. I hope this is where it's supposed to be.

Nonetheless, it's starting to freak me out a bit about that a week from now we may...no we WILL know about the number of eggs, the retrieval dates, and how my lining looks.

Crappity crap that just freaks me out.

I did reassure myself that if my lining looks horrible, the clinic will freeze all the embryos and with a 70% success rate with frosties, that won't completely derail us.

But I'm sort of becoming a little anxious thinking "A week! A week! Holy shit, it all starts in a week! And in two weeks, the embies will most likely be back in me and in three weeks, we'll know whether I'm pregnant or not. Holy. Freakin'. Shit. "

I wonder why I'm having a hard time sleeping at nights?

It did occur to me that this feels a lot like moving to me. I've moved completely across country three times now. Each time, I was excited but relatively calm getting ready for the move. And then on the day of the move, I freaked our realizing "HOLY SHITE, I'M MOVING ACROSS COUNTRY!!" I'm fine before the move and I'm fine once I'm on the road. But the day of travel freaks my freak.

This cycle feels a lot like that.